Category: Pastoral Ministry

Posted on

The Missing Ingredient in Too Many Marriages: Joy

Note from Tim: This article originally appeared at Focus on the Family’s The Focused Pastor. You will regularly see articles I have written for The Focused Pastor here. However, I will continue to write articles for both pastors and all Christians. If you are not a pastor but you find this helpful, please pass it on to your pastor! Also, the biblical marriage principles about joy in marriage apply to all marriages.

Like cupcakes missing sugar, too many Christian marriages are missing a key ingredient. Just because a marriage is missing this ingredient doesn’t mean it’s not a marriage, just as a cupcake missing sugar doesn’t mean it’s not a cupcake. But neither “tastes” good. 

When we realize that what is at stake is not a bad batch of baked goods but potentially a poor reflection of the gospel through our marriage relationship, we will do all we can to put the ingredient of joy back into our marriages. Many Christian marriages, including ministry marriages, would be sweet again if husbands took the lead in loving their wives joyfully.

My wife is usually pretty positive with me, but one evening, she looked at me and said, “Did you know you’re pretty grumpy most of the time right now?” That knocked me a little off-kilter. She knew things had been stressful at church. She had been supportive and prayerful with me. But after I stopped defending myself in my mind and started to think about what she had the courage to point out, I asked her more about it and realized that she was right. I was getting so consumed with trying to stay on top of pastoral ministry while dealing with multiple fronts during a difficult season in our church that it was negatively affecting my parenting—and our marriage.

I had to ask for forgiveness and start to make changes. Nothing was immediate, but choice by choice, joy began to seep back into our marriage and family. 

As I evaluated what happened, I realized that in trying to be Jesus for my church, I had not loved my wife like Jesus loves the church. Ephesians 5:25 is loud and clear on our calling: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” 

Love to Love Your Wife

One specific way that Christ loved the church, a way that God calls us to echo his love in our marriages, is that Jesus loved the church joyfully. He loves to love us. Do we love to love our wives?

Jesus doesn’t just put up with the church. He receives joy by giving us joy (Hebrews 12:2). Jesus doesn’t love the church grudgingly but persistently. He joyfully and persistently loves us. Jesus’ love doesn’t change based on our relationship with him on any given day. 

When wives know that their husbands love to love them, there is a security in marriage that develops and strengthens over years. This security frees a wife to be an even greater blessing to others. Also, when we love our wives so joyfully that it’s obvious to her and others, a sweetness develops. When a pastor and wife exude this sweetness to their church and others through the genuine joy in their marriage, their marriage “smells” like the gospel. A joyful marriage covenant points to the New Covenant.

Cultivating Joy

Here are four ways to cultivate more consistent joy in your marriage as you strive to reflect Christ in the love you have for your wife.

1. Spend intentional time together.

Jesus delights to be with his bride. Yet, I am shocked at how quickly I can coast in marriage. The demands of ministry, bills, raising children, home repair, and just making it through each day can mean that I look up and we haven’t had enough intentional time together. We have found that a weekly date night is unrealistic in this season of five kids, including toddlers and teenagers. But we can still purposefully set aside one night or more a week to cuddle on the couch together while we watch a movie or talk. And we can still intentionally carve out times that we go out together without kids, both for a few hours and occasionally for a few days. 

Are you as intentional to spend time with your wife as you are to follow up on shepherding issues at church?

2. Talk about what God is teaching you.

Joy ultimately comes from Jesus (Luke 2:10, Matthew 28:8, 1 Peter 1:8, 1 John 1:4). When you invest personally in your relationship with Jesus, true joy will seep into your marriage. I have found that when we talk about what God is teaching us, whether spontaneously or as an intentional question, it encourages each other’s walks with the Lord and begins to spill over into our marriage relationship. Pastors, God is teaching you in the Word every week. Share some of that with your wife, not as an additional sermon but out of the joy of knowing Jesus. 

3. Act like Jesus is King.

One of the greatest pieces of advice I have ever heard from another pastor is to talk about church matters as appropriate or needed with your wife for just a little bit when you get home. Then pray together about it before moving on with the evening if there’s a pressing issue, but act like Jesus is king. It is easy to bring things up again and just go around and around about ministry. That is okay to a degree if it helps you serve others together, but at some point, you need to have discussions that are not ministry-related, especially if the issues are stressful. Give it to Jesus, and let it go for the evening (Matthew 6:34).

4. Serve together in some way.

Serving as a pastor does not mean I am automatically serving Jesus with my wife. It can be okay to serve in different areas of the church or family life, depending on the season of life and giftedness. After all, she is not a pastor because she is married to you. But I have found that doing some ministry purposefully together has been helpful. For us, that has been as varied as visitation, foster care, planning an outreach together, or being on the worship team together. Serving together purposefully can bring joy to your marriage, reminding you that God brought you together to glorify him.

Brothers, does your wife not only know that you love her but know that you love to love her, as your Savior does? The marriage of A.W. Tozer leaves us with a somber warning. In his book I Still Do, Dave Harvey recounts: “Tozer was a spiritual giant—a man of spectacular faith, incredible insight, and compelling godliness. But Tozer neglected his wife, Ada, and their family in some pretty stunning ways…After Tozer’s death, Ada remarried a man named Leonard Odam. Dorsett [Tozer’s biographer] writes of a poignant moment when Ada was asked to describe her life with her new husband. ‘I have never been happier in my life,’ Ada observed. ‘Aiden [Tozer] loved Jesus Christ, but Leonard Odam loves me.’”[1]

Brothers, we can love both Jesus and our wives well. We are called to love both. A marriage that “smells” like the gospel will have one often-overlooked ingredient: joy.

[1] Dave Harvey, I Still Do (Grand Rapids: Baker Books, 2020), p. 193.

Posted on

Yes, Churches and Parachurch Ministries Can Partner in Healthy Ways

This article was originally published at The Focused Pastor.

My life and ministry have been deeply impacted by the local church partnering with parachurch ministries. I met my wife at a college ministry, and we got to know each other better by attending the same church. If I weren’t sold on the potential value of parachurch ministries, the fact that God used a college ministry to meet my wife on a secular campus with tens of thousands of college students would convince me! 

However, sometimes pastors can feel that the two are at odds with each other. We know that the local church is God’s “Plan A.” Jesus promised to build his church (Matthew 16:18)! Parachurch ministries will come and go, but the local church will endure until Jesus returns. We need to remember these truths to keep our priorities straight, with the church being God’s main method for the advancement of the gospel and the discipleship of his people. Yet, I have found over the years that most parachurch ministries want to come alongside the local church, not replace it. Here are three ways churches and parachurch ministries can partner in healthy ways.

1. Partnership can equip churches and believers to do what they might struggle to do on their own

The sheer scope and specialization of parachurch ministries are astounding. Essentially meaning any ministry that is outside of the local church but that exists to do some form of gospel ministry, the list goes on and on. It includes biblical counseling organizations, after-school Bible clubs, campus Bible studies, sports ministry, pregnancy resource centers, disaster relief, homeless shelters, food pantries, substance abuse recovery, Christian camps, college ministries, Christian schools and colleges, marriage and family ministries, media ministries, curriculums, conferences, even international missions organizations and more!

A decade ago, we had a passion to begin an after-school Bible club in our local elementary school essentially because one of our missions partners had been leading churches and Christians in doing this for decades. I remember going into the principal’s office to talk with her about starting the club and being so thankful for this parachurch ministry and our missionary who worked with them. She knew exactly what the laws were and how to build a good relationship with the school through the process. A similar situation happened years later when we had a burden to begin a Bible study at the local high school.

Thanks to a sports ministry, the first Bible study anyone can ever remember started at that high school. Youth from our church have been encouraged in their faith by meeting fellow believers they may not have met otherwise, and some have attended our church’s youth ministry. Partnering with parachurch ministries has equipped us for further ministry.

2. Partnership can display the expansiveness of the Kingdom of God

Through local churches and parachurch ministries partnering together, the world can see Christians working together in a unique way, and believers can be reminded of the immensity of the Kingdom of God.

For example, when local churches partner together through pregnancy resource centers, the world tangibly sees that Christians are putting hands and feet to their pro-life beliefs. When a disaster happens, and Christian groups are the only ones still serving a community six months later, the world visibly sees and feels the love of Christ through believers from many different churches despite their differences. This puts the gospel on display in a unique way, showing the unity we have in Christ with all true believers. 

On the night before His death, Jesus asked the Father, “…that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” (John 17:21, see also 17:11, 17:20-23).  Christians from different local churches partnering together in unity displays something unique about even the unity of the Trinity and is a witness to the world.

Believers are also reminded through healthy church and parachurch partnerships that the Kingdom of God is bigger than their local fellowship. No church is an island. Pastors are responsible for examining doctrinal alignment to a certain extent before a church works with a parachurch ministry, but a healthy partnership can remind believers of the expansiveness of the Kingdom of God. 

I love that our church’s youth ministry disciples and evangelizes our church’s youth and friends regularly. Week in and week out, those teens from our church and their friends are built up in their faith or challenged to consider the gospel. Once a year, however, our youth ministry brings our teens to a large gathering of 600-1,000 youth and leaders, sponsored by a parachurch ministry, for a gospel outreach and all-nighter. Seeing hundreds of teens from across the region, both believers and unbelievers, reminds our teenagers that they are not alone as the only believers in their local church or schools. Seeing the passion of other churches for unbelieving friends stokes their hearts for evangelism.

3. Partnership can build up the universal church and expand gospel reach

The parachurch partnerships that I have come to appreciate, support, and even personally benefit from the most as a local pastor are the ones that truly do encourage involvement in a local church. I remember meeting one parachurch leader at a local high school who told me he would never refer a new believer to a church. We chose not to work with him since involvement in a local church is the next step for any new believer. However, I have found that most parachurch ministry leaders encourage church involvement and see us as part of the same team. I view them the same way.

My wife and I recently attended a marriage retreat, and I was so thrilled when they not only shared the gospel but also emphasized the importance of gathering with a local church week in and week out. In fact, attending that marriage retreat was a great illustration of how churches and parachurch ministries can partner in healthy ways. The kind of broad reach that this marriage retreat had meant that believers from many different types of churches and backgrounds came together. We enjoyed fellowship with other couples we know from different denominations, couples who have encouraged our marriage and walk with the Lord but who we don’t usually see on a Sunday or even during an average week. I plan to bring couples from our church next year.

Years ago, when we began that after-school Bible club in an elementary school, one girl named Sierra was ecstatic that there was a “Jesus club” at her school. She was raised by a single mom who did not have a church background, and for some reason, Sierra was interested in knowing more about Jesus. I remember her fascination during the Bible story time. That summer, Sierra came to vacation Bible school at our church, and she prayed with me to receive Christ after I shared the gospel in her class. A few months later, Sierra was baptized in our church while her whole family was there, and then she began to attend our church’s youth ministry.

Meeting my wife and baptizing a new believer are why I am thankful for parachurch ministries. My life has been immeasurably enriched, and my pastoral ministry has been built up thanks to healthy gospel partnerships. Yours can be, too!

Posted on

Our Extraordinary Christ

I wrote this piece for Small Town Summits Articles. I am the Content Manager for STS Articles. I hope that it encourages both small-town pastors and lay Christians.

Is your Jesus big enough? In other words, is he the real Jesus? I know of nothing more powerful that will keep you trusting in Christ and serving him wherever he has called you than a fresh view of who Jesus is and what he has done. Erik Raymond insightfully writes, “The road to apostasy is paved with indifference to the glory of Christ.” We could add, the road to flaming out in pastoral ministry before our ministry is complete is paved with indifference to the glory of Christ.

The book of Hebrews teaches us that knowing and loving Jesus is what will keep us from apostasy (Hebrews 2:1-4, 3:12-19, 4:14, 5:11-6:8, 10:19-23, 12:25-29). It also teaches us that knowing and loving Jesus will give us the endurance to continue on in ministry (Hebrews 3:1-3, 4:16, 6:9-12, 10:22-25, 10:32-39, 11:1ff, 12:1-3, 12:12-16, 13:1ff).

Mixed with the blessings of being a pastor, we all have moments when we wonder if pastoral ministry is worth it. Sometimes those moments can be magnified by the unique challenges of ministry in a small place. One family moves away, and their absence is felt for the next year plus. You wonder if pouring out your life for the indifferent people in this town is the best use of your one life. A Sunday morning of low attendance makes you wonder about the future of your church. In almost a decade of pastoring in a small town in Vermont, I have felt all of those things and much more. But what has kept me at my post when I have felt like moving on is a realization of who Jesus is and that as long as he has a ministry for me in this small place, he is worth it. The greatness of Jesus propels me forward, and I know that he can do the same for you.

Hebrews 1:1-3 gives a mind-blowing view of the extraordinary Christ. This understanding of who Jesus is keeps us from thinking of Jesus as small in our small-town ministries. Five simple truths in these three verses can keep us faithful, and keep us fruitful.

1) Jesus Owns Everything!

Our extraordinary Christ doesn’t need anything. Hebrews 1:1-2a explains, “Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed the heir of all things…” Knowing that the Savior whom we serve is the “heir of all things” reminds me that Jesus is Lord over my small town. Most may not recognize it yet, but he is still Lord. This truth also reminds me that he can provide for our small church in extraordinary ways when he chooses to. We have story after story of God providing buildings and finances and using our church to advance the gospel in our community, New England and around the world when it seemed impossible. We have seen the Lord of the harvest turn souls to himself in answer to prayer, when year after year of sowing gospel seeds didn’t appear to be bearing any fruit. When we recognize that Jesus owns it all, we can serve him and rest with joy.

2) Jesus Created Everything!

Hebrews 1:2b, still talking about Jesus, shocks us: “…through whom also he created the world.” It is easy to forget this truth because Jesus can seem so relatable at times. He walked among us. He was born in a small town. He died for me. Yet he is so cosmic. John 1:3 explains more: “All things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made.” Colossians 1:16-17 takes our understanding a step further: “For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.”

Scientists tell us that there are probably about 100 billion galaxies and that each galaxy itself contains about one hundred thousand million stars (is that even a number?!). Jesus created it all! And the creator of it all who holds it all together cares about your small-town church. In fact, when you think about the greatness of space and the fact that he created it, everything is a small place compared to him.

3) Jesus Displays God in Everything!

Hebrews 1:3a continues to exult in Jesus, “He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature…” I want you to notice what the writer of Hebrews did not say. He did not say that Jesus is the reflection of God, like the moon reflects the brightness or glory of the sun. He says in Hebrews 1:3 that Jesus is the radiance of the glory of God, which means that he radiates the glory of God himself. In other words, we don’t look to Jesus to see a reflection of God, we look to Jesus to see God!

The fullest revelation of God’s glory that we have is Jesus. And we know that Jesus cared about the cities and the small places. He ministered in Jerusalem and Galilee. We reflect God’s glory when we reflect Jesus’s heart for the small places.

4) Jesus Upholds Everything!

If Jesus could go out of existence, the universe would immediately disintegrate and actually disappear. “…and he upholds the universe by the word of his power…” (Hebrews 1:3b) The reason that molecules act as they act is not because of the laws of science, it is because of the Lord Jesus! This is why he could multiply bread or speak to the water and wind. If Jesus can uphold everything, then he can uphold you no matter what challenges you are facing in life or ministry!

5) Jesus Forgave You For Everything!

We can be in awe of somebody great, but it doesn’t mean that we know them or love them. Yet the same one who is so great is the same one who died for you! Hebrews 1:3c reminds us, “…After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high…” Constantly reminding ourselves of the gospel takes us from knowing Jesus to loving Jesus. And truly loving Jesus means we will not only continue in the faith, but continue serving him.

Jesus is the wow factor in our small-town churches. If we continue to press into our extraordinary Christ, we will find that we can also press on for him.

Posted on

Three Reasons For Pastors to Care About Marriage

Note from Tim: This article originally appeared at Focus on the Family’s The Focused Pastor. You will regularly see articles I have written for The Focused Pastor here. However, I will continue to write articles for both pastors and all Christians. If you are not a pastor but you find this helpful, please pass it on to your pastor!

The more we, as pastors, have a biblical view of marriage, the more we will care about marriage. We minister and live in a culture that thinks it can redefine marriage with no negative consequences. We preach weekly to kids and teens who need to hear that God created marriage for human flourishing and to reflect the love of Jesus in a special way. We teach and shepherd married couples who are hurting, looking for hope, and don’t know where to turn. 

The rise of singleness in the U.S.[1] sometimes makes us hesitant to talk about marriage too much from the pulpit or to put too much emphasis on marriage classes. While singleness is good, and the church needs to recapture that biblical truth (1 Corinthians 7:6-8), pastors must discuss marriage from the pulpit and make plans to have at least occasional marriage classes, enrichment, and resource recommendations for married couples. 

Here are three reasons we as pastors must care about marriage:

1. We must care about marriage because marriage is a gospel issue

Nothing is more important in the Christian life than the gospel (1 Corinthians 15:3-5). In Ephesians 5:22-33, the longest passage in the New Testament on marriage, Paul explains how marriage uniquely points to the gospel and undergirds marriage. 

Every marriage says something about the gospel, even if the couple knows nothing about the gospel. God embedded marriage into the culture at the beginning of time (Genesis 2:18-25) as a quiet pointer to the gospel (Ephesians 5:29-32). So, the question that pastors need to face is, what do the marriages in my church say about the gospel? The enemy who wasted no time attacking marriage right after it was created (Genesis 2:25) continues to attack it today.

Yet, when marriages thrive, they adorn the gospel (Titus 2:10). When marriages fail, they detract from the winsomeness of the gospel. When we, as pastors, care about marriage, teach and preach about it, and point the people in our churches to good marriage resources, we show them how they live in their marriages matters because the gospel matters. 

2. We must care about marriage because Jesus cares about marriage

When the Pharisees asked Jesus about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19 and Mark 10, the answer Jesus gave continues to echo down to us today, answering questions about divorce and why Christians should care about even the definition of marriage. The Lord clearly states that God created Adam as male and Eve as female, but His answer in those Gospels also reminds us that God is the Creator. Changing the definition of marriage will have disastrous consequences as we try to “un-god” God and “god” ourselves with the powers of creation. Because God created it, marriage was never ours to change. 

Only in the differences of male and female (Matthew 19:4) can there be the union of marriage (Matthew 19:5-6). Remember, Jesus started answering the disciples’ questions about marriage by asking, “Have you not read?” If Jesus were answering us today as we asked him about same-sex marriage or the basic definition of marriage, there is no doubt that he would say something along the lines of, “Have you not read?” referring to either Genesis or the Gospels.

There is beauty, function, meaning, and gospel pointers in marriage between a husband and wife. Christians must now build a broader foundation in sharing our faith and discipling our kids and young believers as cultural definitions of marriage change, which means pastors have more work to do regarding what marriage is.  

It is hard to preach and teach even the basic definition of marriage in our world today because there are so many different assumptions. Yet clear, biblical teaching rooted in Scripture, which is also compassionate and full of grace, will draw many to Christ and God’s plan amid our cultural chaos. The pastor who teaches about marriage will know that he has God’s blessing on his ministry because Jesus cares about marriage.

3. We must care about marriage because we care about couples and children being safer and happier

When people follow God’s design, they thrive. Life works. Pastors care about marriage and preach and teach about it because couples and children are safer and happier when they follow a biblical view of marriage.

In Nancy Pearcey’s 2023 book The Toxic War on Masculinity, she points out that about 90 percent of evangelical Christians continue to accept the idea of complementarian roles in the home, including the headship of the husband. [2] These are the same ideas about gender and marriage in particular that are often thought of as archaic at their best and abusive at their worst. Citing study after study, Pearcey shows that the data indicates that Christian men who attend church at least three times a month “are more loving to their wives and more emotionally engaged with their children than any other group in America. They are the least likely to divorce, and they have the lowest levels of domestic abuse and violence.”[3]

We know God designed marriage to make us holy before he designed it to make us happy. We know that marriage is one of God’s greatest sanctification tools because of the covenant relationship that does not allow us to run from our sins or our problems without significant consequences. Yet we also know that when couples follow God’s design to love each other like Jesus, communicate in ways the Bible tells them to, see each other as equal but different, and pursue a deeper friendship with each other, they will be happier. 

We can all look back over the years of our ministries and think of couples who have been through great heartache but have fought battles and won by God’s grace. Their marriages are not perfect, but they are better than they used to be.

We, as pastors, have a lot on our plates. At the beginning of each week, you may look over your planner and let out a big sigh or a prayer that says, “God, I’m not sure where to place my priorities this week because I can’t do it all.” Make sure that as you look at each week—which turns into each month, which turns into each year—that you include purposeful marriage enrichment and teaching and shepherding in your ministry plans. God cares deeply about marriage. Shepherds who look like Jesus do, too—and know they have God’s smile upon their ministries.

[1] In 1960, about 10 percent of American adults were single, and in 2012, that number rose to nearly half for the first time in history. Cited in William P. Farley, Marriage in Paradise: How to Have a Genesis Two Marriage in a Genesis Three World, (Pinnacle, 2018), 30.

[2] Nancy R. Pearcey, The Toxic War on Masculinity: How Christianity Reconciles the Sexes (Grand Rapids, Baker Books), 35.

[3] The Toxic War on Masculinity, 36.

Posted on

Cultivating Trust with New Church Attendees

Note from Tim: This article originally appeared at Focus on the Family’s The Focused Pastor. You will regularly see articles I have written for The Focused Pastor here. However, I will continue to write articles for both pastors and all Christians. If you are not a pastor but you find this helpful, please pass it on to your pastor!

I have noticed over the years that somebody attending my church and pastoring them are often two different things. Formally, membership is how our church recognizes that somebody has publicly said that our church is their home church. But I have often found that before membership, there is a moment when a new attendee calls you “pastor,” and you know that you have a new sacred relationship that God has allowed you to have.

Sometimes, we build trust quickly, and God places a new sheep right where they need to be. I think of the family who moved to our town from over 1,500 miles away, visited our church the following Sunday, and never left until they moved out of state again five years later. I think of another family who visited our church for about a month before the husband asked if he could go to coffee with me. I couldn’t read them and wondered if he had a lot of questions before they would settle into our church life. He looked at me after the first sip of joe and said with a big smile, “Our family is ready to join your church. We have found our church home.”

I also think of the lady who had to leave a church that no longer believed the Bible was the inerrant Word of God. It took her about a year of attending off and on before we had that same conversation at the same coffee shop.

But I also think of the primarily Spanish-speaking attendee who first called me pastor when I knocked on her door during a snowstorm. She had been attending for about six months, but I still did not have her phone number or e-mail address. I did know where she lived, and I wanted to make sure that she understood that the kid’s Christmas pageant practices were starting in a few days in case her kids wanted to be a part of it. Driving to her house and knocking on the door while the snow fell to make sure we included her in our church family was what she needed to call me “pastor.” As I saw the trust built, I realized I had acted as a shepherd representing the care of Christ in her life. I baptized her about six months later.

There are three main ways I have learned to shepherd new attendees into being part of our local flock.

1. Building trust

 Attendees of a new church need to know that they can trust you as their pastor. Yes, we are only imperfect men who serve a perfect Savior. But they must know if you go to God’s Word to get answers for life and eternity. This will primarily start with your preaching ministry. Recently, new attendees often know how we hold to God’s Word because they have researched us on our website and often watched our live stream or listened to sermons before they visited the first time.

Once they walk through your church doors, trust is built as you or other members or leaders connect with them, and they know that somebody cares they attended your church. We all need to know that God’s Word is taught and that God’s Word is lived out, and that includes welcoming strangers no matter their beliefs or backgrounds. Each new attendee, each new family or individual, needs to move at their own pace as God leads them.

2. Assessing trust 

You continue to build trust Trust as you and your church’s credibility grows in a new attendee’s eyes. Do they know you and the church members will pray for them? Can they talk with somebody about their questions about the church, the gospel, or God’s Word? Sometimes, that trust is built as they continue to attend Sunday after Sunday, and other times, that trust is built more slowly or as they are contacted to check in on them because they have not attended in a while. Even if they have moved on to another church, I have never had somebody tell me that I should not have checked in on them. This includes learning their name or getting them in touch with another elder or leader who will know them and their family and who can start to get them more involved in the life of the church so that they can grow in Christ, be ministered to, and eventually minister through your local body.

3. Cultivating trust

We cultivate trust as we grow together in Christ. The church is a dynamic organism, constantly changing as people move, are born, die, leave, or unite themselves to your local body. Yet a dynamic church is not necessarily seen in how large it is or whether or not it is growing in numbers in any given season. A church that is alive cares for its members, new attendees, and the community, seeking to apply the gospel of Christ to their lives.

Sometimes, that trust is built through serving together. Only members can serve in our children’s ministry, for example, but we let a relatively new attendee participate in helping with our Block Party outreach. Serving together showed her this was a church community with which she wanted to live her Christian life. When somebody is fighting cancer or going through some other hardship, alerting the church membership to how they can serve them is another way we have cultivated trust. We are called to show the love of Christ to all.

There is joy in representing Jesus and in pointing people to the Great Shepherd of our souls. Harold Senkbeil, in his book The Care of Souls, says that a sheepdog always has his tail wagging when he is working, and one eye is always on his master. If your eyes are on the Master, it will hit you as it sometimes hits me: I get the privilege to serve Jesus as his errand boy today—wherever and in whatever way he chooses to take me for that day or that season.

Yet, at the same time, pastoral ministry is challenging. There have been many times I have considered pursuing a different career. Yet there are many more things that keep drawing me back: the glory of Christ and the gospel, the sense I can’t shake that this is what God wants me to do, my wife & pastor friends who share love and encouragement with me, seeing people saved and growing in their walk with Jesus, and a co-worker and fellow church members who love serving God through serving his people.

Near the top of that list, I add the joy of that moment when you realize that under Jesus, you have a new sheep to lead. Keep shepherding each one towards Christ. There is no greater privilege.

Posted on

Pastoral Weakness and The Power of Christ

Note from Tim: This article was originally published at Focus on the Family’s “The Focused Pastor.” These ideas came from a talk I gave at Small Town Summits in Vermont, Rhode Island & Connecticut.

I didn’t plan to write a sermon on the power of Christ in weakness with a fever. Yet that is where I found myself this spring, preparing a sermon on 2 Corinthians 12:1-10. Day in and day out that week, I would try to write that sermon and do other ministry I had planned. Day after day, my physical and mental weakness frustrated my plans. Many more than three times, I pleaded with the Lord to deliver me and take the sickness away. Here’s what I kept hearing as I opened God’s Word to prepare to preach: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

I have had a fairly healthy last several months, but a fever this morning has peaked as I write this. God wants me to learn again that the power of Christ will rest on me in my weakness. Sometimes God says no to our prayers to work out his purpose, which is greater than we could ever see on this side of Heaven.

For you, it may be much more serious than a fever. It has been a challenging year for me with various trials, but nothing as serious or life-threatening as cancer as some of my church members and a pastor friend are dealing with. Whatever weakness you are struggling with personally or in pastoral ministry, 2 Corinthians 12 teaches us that the power of Christ rests upon us in our suffering.

A personal pastoral weakness

Second Corinthians is a highly personal letter. Paul is writing to a church he had spent at least 18 months planting and establishing. He knew these people. He loved these people. He had shared God’s Word and the gospel with them. Yet false teachers, whom Paul sometimes called “super-apostles” in a tongue-in-cheek way in this letter (2 Corinthians 11:5-6), had come in and brought false teaching. They received an audience from the Corinthian church by discrediting Paul as an apostle, but not in the way we might expect. It was through personal attacks like making fun of his appearance or saying, “He’s so tough in his letters, but wait until you meet him in person.” (See this idea in 2 Corinthians 10:10)

We need to put ourselves in Paul’s shoes to realize how personally difficult it would be not only to have someone in our church giving us a hard time, as we’ve all experienced, but even making fun of us. Yet to make matters worse, it seems that part of what the “super-apostles” were using to discredit Paul is that he had so many weaknesses. As you read 2 Corinthians, you can almost hear them taunting, “If Paul is a true Apostle, then why does he have so many difficulties?”

The power of Christ tabernacles with us in our weakness

Yet Paul found that his “thorn in the flesh,” as difficult as it was and as much as it was a messenger of Satan (2 Corinthians 12:7), was being used by God to keep him from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the spiritual revelations he had received. The word “thorn” in 2 Corinthians 12:7 is strong—it can mean a stake. His revelations and visions threatened to puff him up, so God sent a thorn to burst his bubble and make him humble.

Brothers, here is the hard but important truth we will sometimes experience in ministry: God is more concerned with our character and spiritual growth than our comfort. The discomfort is often how he meets us. Paul explains in 2 Corinthians 12:8-9a, “Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness…”

Sometimes God chooses not to deliver us from the trial but through the trial. And here’s the beautiful thing that can’t be missed—in our weakness, the power of Christ rests upon us in a way that we would not experience if we were not in that trial.

When Paul writes at the end of 2 Corinthians 12:9, “…Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me,” there is an important phrase used. “Rest upon me” at the end of verse 9 is the vocabulary of the Tabernacle, from the time when God pitched his tent with his people (Exodus 40:34). It is also the language used of Jesus when “the word became flesh and dwelt among us.” (John 1:14) Jesus tabernacled among us when he came to earth, just as the glory of the LORD tabernacled with his people through the Tabernacle and later the Temple.

The breathtaking truth of 2 Corinthians 12:9 is that the all-powerful Christ “pitches his tent” with his people in their weakness. He rests upon you in his strength when you are weak. Your pastoral weakness is where Jesus pitches his tent with you.

Do you not know what to say to that difficult theological question? The power of Christ pitches his tent with you in your weakness.

Do you not know what to do or say when a family in your church goes through tragedy? The power of Christ pitches his tent with you in your weakness.

Do you feel weary in ministry, wondering if you can continue to handle the pressure? The power of Christ pitches his tent with you in your weakness.

Are you or someone in your family battling an illness? The power of Christ pitches his tent with you in your weakness.

Whatever you may be facing today that shows your weakness in pastoral ministry, it is an opportunity to experience Christ resting upon you. The only requirement is that you are weak because Jesus is strong!

Posted on

The Secret to Loving Your Wife Better: Love Jesus Better

Note from Tim: This article originally was published at Focus on the Family’s “The Focused Pastor” ministry. The content applies to non-pastor husbands as well!

This post was also featured in Tim Challies’ A La Carte.

I recently heard somebody say that one of the ways to endure well in ministry is to realize that ministry is not about you. It’s all about Jesus. The same is true of marriage. When you embrace that marriage is about Jesus first and you and your wife second, one of the secrets of a joyful, enduring marriage comes to light: love Jesus better, and you will love your wife better.

As pastors, it seems we should know this instinctively. Our calling is directly tied to helping others know Jesus better. But we are no different than our church members. We must constantly remind ourselves that marriage is about Jesus first and works best when we love Jesus first.

As I have studied what the Bible says about marriage – both for my growth and for those I shepherd – I have become convinced that Christ’s relationship with the church is the controlling metaphor that God has given us to help us understand marriage. A controlling metaphor is a word picture that explains something for an entire work of literature. At the beginning of the Bible, when God created marriage in the Garden of Eden, He initiated a human covenant relationship that He knew would reflect the relationship between His Son and His people. Even so many years before Jesus, even in the Garden, God pointed ahead to his Son.

The Marriage Supper of the Lamb

At the end of the Bible, when God plans a celebration feast for the consummation of the ages, he describes it using what term? The marriage Supper of the Lamb (Revelation 19:7, 9)! When we love our wives like Christ loves the church, we play our part in a story that has been told since the beginning of time, a story that all creation will continue to celebrate at the end of time as we step into the beginning of forever.

Paul points this out in Ephesians 5:31-32, when he quotes Genesis 2:24, and then explains there are depths to marriage we can only begin to understand on this side of eternity: 

“‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” 

Marriage refers to Christ and the church. God embedded marriage in culture as a quiet pointer to the gospel. So, when we love our wives well, we point to Jesus. But also, when we love Jesus well, we love our wives better.

Closer to Jesus, Closer to My Wife

After two decades of marriage, I have noticed a pattern: when I am closer to Jesus, I am usually closer to my wife. Why is this? Paul David Tripp helpfully explains in his book, What Did You Expect?: 

“A marriage of love, unity, and understanding is not rooted in romance; it is rooted in worship…No marriage will be unaffected when the people in the marriage are seeking to get from the creation what they were only ever meant to get from the Creator.”

This applies to pastors as much as anyone else. Yet, there are certain dangers inherent in our vocation. We may think that because we serve Jesus daily as part of our job, we are naturally close to Him. But one test of a man’s walk with Christ is how he treats his wife. This is not to say that if we are close to Jesus, we will always be close to our wives. The fact that you are a sinner married to a sinner in a world groaning under the curse means your marriage will have ups and downs. But making your relationship with Christ a priority is the start of finding the freedom and power to love your wife humbly and selflessly as Jesus loves us, no matter what is going on in your relationship or ministry. 

Order Your Love Rightly

When you remember that Jesus is your first love (see Revelation 2:4-5), his love naturally overflows out of your life and into your wife. It’s not that loving Jesus and loving your wife are commands from God that are at odds with each other, it is that we can only love others rightly when we order our love rightly. 

Jesus explained how loving God results in loving others: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:37-39) Your wife is your closest neighbor, so Jesus’ words remind us of our priorities as shepherds of God’s people: love Jesus, love your wife, love your kids, and love others, including your church family and community.

Fellow pastors and ministry leaders, don’t forget that there is one time the Bible commands you to get drunk: “…Be intoxicated always in her love” (Proverbs 5:19). God wants you to be drunk with love for your wife. This is best for you, her, your kids, and your church, and it glorifies God. Pursue her simply for the joy of pursuing her and because you love her. But don’t forget that you will love your wife better when you love Jesus. Root your pursuit of her in the fact that Christ has pursued you. Embracing this secret can be the secret to embracing a joy-filled marriage.

Rekindle your love for Jesus, and be in tune with his heart for reflecting the gospel in your marriage. Then your marriage will be like a fire that keeps you both warm and gives light to others.

Posted on

A Loving Life: A Book (and a Life) that Small-Town Pastors Need

This article originally appeared at Small Town Summits Articles. I serve as the Content Manager for Small Town Summits Articles.

There are books, both in the Bible and on your shelf, that can sometimes take you by surprise. They are books that God uses to shake you up, to comfort you, to strengthen you, or to show you blind spots in your life or ministry. The book of Ruth and a book about Ruth, A Loving Life: In a World of Broken Relationships by Paul E. Miller, both did that for me recently.

The book of Ruth has left our church, and me, changed. A Loving Life left me in tears as I read the last page, something that hadn’t happened to me in a long time.

I had planned to preach the book of Ruth for Advent this year, and about a month before I would begin preaching it, I was at a Small Town Summits Leadership Retreat. One of our co-founders, David Pinckney, recommended A Loving Life, a study of Ruth, and said that it was one of the best marriage books he had ever read that isn’t really a marriage book. Since I love studying the topic of marriage and was going to be preaching the book of Ruth soon, I ordered it that week. A month later, I ordered it for our Elders and Deacons to read and encouraged their wives to read it as well, and ordered another copy for our church library. It’s that good.

There was something about studying the book of Ruth at this season in our church’s life that was just exactly what we needed. Church members were encouraged to see God working in ordinary lives in a small town through ordinary means of kindness and hard work. There was a freshness to the gospel as we saw how God prepared the line of King David and ultimately the line of King Jesus to come through Ruth and Boaz. We marveled at the patience and mercy of God in bitter Naomi’s life as she thought she had returned to Bethlehem empty, but then experienced the fullness of God’s grace by the end of the book. And we were challenged and inspired by Ruth’s kindness and chesed love as she reflected the covenant steadfast love of Yahweh over and over and over again throughout the book.

A Loving Life helped me to process the book of Ruth in bite-size chapters that explain a small portion of the text, with robust application and illustration for today. Here are three reasons that the biblical lessons from A Loving Life are especially relevant to small-town pastors. 

Reminders that God Works Through the Small and the Ordinary

God’s providence is all over the book of Ruth and because of this, all over A Loving Life. It is impossible to read these books and feel that God is distant or uninvolved in small places and ordinary lives. Bethlehem was not Jerusalem—yet this is where this great drama that ultimately leans towards God’s plan of redemption in Christ takes place. Ruth went to work gleaning in a field to provide for her and Naomi while Naomi grieved—and through that ordinary act of work God provided food, a husband, a baby to continue the family line, and a place for Ruth and Boaz in the kingly line of Christ!

Small-town pastors need to often be reminded that God works through the small and the ordinary. We need to hear what Miller writes: “To love is to limit…Ironically, the experience of love, of narrowing your life, broadens and deepens your life….Love always involved a narrowing of the life, a selecting of imperfection. So God’s love for us lands. It landed in Bethlehem sometime in the fall or winter of 5/6 BC as a little Jewish boy. God’s love is so specific it boggles the mind.”[1]

Reminders that God Works To Humble Us and Then Exalt Us

In one of the most significant chapters in the book, “The Gospel Shape of Love,” Miller explains how God often brings resurrection through death to ourselves. He explains how we are not trapped in a pagan view of the world, a cycle of life and death. Rather, because of the gospel our lives literally move through a “J-curve” of life, death, and then resurrection.

This is not only about eternity, because many times this is how God works in our lives as followers of Jesus today. We are called to die to our dreams and desires to live for what God has called us to. For small-town pastors, this often means humbling ourselves to be content with a small, hidden place of service, knowing that God sees and knows and cares. When we don’t work to exalt ourselves but to exalt Jesus where he has sovereignly placed us to serve him, we are in exactly the place he wants us to be. As Miller describes this spiritual principle: “As we go downward into death, we are active: active in seeking humility, in taking the lower place, in mindless, hidden serving. This is the journey Jesus took…We can do death. But we can’t do resurrection. We can’t demand resurrection—we wait for it.”[2] In dying to ourselves, in exalting Jesus, he lifts us up, giving us contentment today, occasional vistas of his work through us today, and ultimately invaluable eternal reward in heaven.

Reminders that God Works Through People Committed to Love

Over and over again, we see Ruth absolutely committed to loving others, and in particular her mother-in-law Naomi, whose God she now serves wholeheartedly. By studying the life of Ruth, we are challenged to love others more like how God calls us to—whether that is through loving your spouse, your children, a widow, a foster child, that difficult church member, or the person in your small town who hates the presence of your church in the community. The kind of love Ruth displays again and again is a quiet pointer to the love of her greatest descendant, “…the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Galatians 2:20b)

A Loving Life is one of those rare books that I felt I could have just dipped in highlighter. I hope that you will read it and be challenged and encouraged and changed. I hope that you will share it with your leaders so that you can all grow into excelling still more at living lives of love. I’ll let the very end of Miller’s book leave you with the last word:

Everything Ruth does—from walking through the gates ignored and unthanked to giving her newborn son to Naomi—is a function of her love for Naomi…You simply can’t beat love. You can’t out-humble it. You can’t suppress it, because you are always free to love no matter how someone treats you. If others are putting nails through your hands, you can forgive them. If someone is shouting curses at you, you can silently receive them. Love is irrepressible.

Faith and hope will one day pass away, but not love. Love is forever.[3]

[1] A Loving Life, p. 74.

[2] A Loving Life, p. 71.

[3] A Loving Life, p. 156.

Posted on

To My Friends Who Are No Longer Friends With Jesus

This article was featured at For The Church and shared as part of The Gospel Coalition’s “Around the Web” articles.

To my friends who are no longer friends with Jesus: I want you to know that if I am aware of you walking away from Jesus, I have prayed for you and even cried for you. A couple of years ago I was reading The Last Battle from C.S. Lewis’s “The Chronicles of Narnia” to our kids. I came across a passage that took my breath away and filled my eyes with tears. Tirian, the last king of Narnia, is meeting the former kings and queens of Narnia:

‘Sir,’ said Tirian, when he had greeted all these. ‘If I have read the chronicle aright, there should be another. Has not your Majesty two sisters? Where is Queen Susan?’

‘My sister Susan,’ answered Peter shortly and gravely, ‘is no longer a friend of Narnia.’

‘Yes,’ said Eustace, ‘and whenever you’ve tried to get her to come and talk about Narnia or do anything about Narnia, she says, ‘What wonderful memories you have! Fancy your still thinking about all those funny games we used to play when we were children.’

The reason I got a lump in my throat and then looked at my wife Melanie and saw that wewere both tearing up is because we were thinking of you, friends. Walking away from Jesus is not child’s play. At the end of The Last Battle, it is revealed that there has been a crash and the kings and queens are in heaven. They are safe, eternally. Susan is not. But there is still time. 

It seemed that you used to be friends with Jesus. You sang to him, you read his Word, you prayed to him, you talked about him with me.

Only God, and maybe you, know if that faith was genuine. But I do know this: the Jesus you used to confess with your lips is the same Jesus who can save you today. It doesn’t matter if it has been years or months of walking away from him, Jesus died and rose again not to make it possible for us to earn our way back to God, but to bring us to God. He will still do that for you if you will come to him.

You are not the first disciples of Jesus to deny Jesus. Do you remember Peter, one of Jesus’s closest disciples and friends? He denied Jesus three times, when Jesus most needed someone to come alongside of him and stand up for him. 

Decades later Peter wrote in 1 Peter 5:8-9, “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.” It has never been easy to be a Christian. What stood true two thousand years ago stands true today: there is a great enemy of your soul.

Peter knew that Satan is active in the world today, and he didn’t just think of the devil like a roaring lion. It’s like Peter was remembering how he had felt that enemy breathing down his neck on the night that he denied Jesus.

But there is someone else described like a lion in the Bible, the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. Jesus is the One who was promised to come and save us. He came and represented God to us as holy and righteous and yet as willing and ready and able to forgive for when we have failed him.

Precious Words of Promise

Some of the most precious words in the Bible are at the end of the Gospel of Mark. After Jesus has risen from the dead, the angel tells the women at the tomb, “…go, tell his disciples and Peter…” (Mark 16:7)

The other disciples had failed too. They had also said they would follow Jesus all of the way. But only one of them, John, stood at the cross at the end. God made sure they all received the message of Jesus’s resurrection— “Go tell the disciples…” But he also put this nugget of grace on the angel’s lips: “…AND Peter.” Peter was a disciple. But God was already moving towards Peter specifically in his specific sin, preparing his heart for restoration.

I don’t know what God has been doing in your lives recently. But reading this article is a start. There is some reason you clicked on it. 

When Peter denied Jesus, Jesus looked at him. If you sense the Lord looking at you right now, you have two choices. 

You can try to run from the gaze of Jesus just like Adam and Eve tried to run from the eyes of God. Or you can run to the gaze of Jesus and see that there is forgiveness and acceptance and restoration in his eyes. 

This is what Peter experienced when the resurrected Jesus came to them later, when Peter had gone back to fishing. When Jesus appeared on the shore, Peter didn’t hold back. Peter couldn’t wait to be near Jesus again. He couldn’t wait for the boat to get to the shore. Peter jumped into the water to go towards Jesus.

He didn’t walk on the water this time; he simply threw himself into the water to get to Jesus. That may be what repentance looks like for you, what coming back to God looks like for you. Just throwing yourself towards Jesus. 

If you do that, I know that Jesus will be waiting for you. Jesus himself promised it and sealed it with his redeeming blood: “All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never cast out.” (John 6:37) 

Friends, if you come back to Jesus, he will welcome you home as his friends, now and for eternity. I hope to see you there.

Posted on

A Sabbatical For a Small-Town Pastor? The Why & the How

This article was featured at Small Town Summits Articles. Tim is the Content Manager for Small Town Summits Articles.

This summer, I had more focused time than I’ve ever had with my wife and kids. We made memories we will never forget and built into our relationships. I rested more than I have in years. I went for prayer walks just because I wanted to enjoy the beauty of God’s creation and to spend some extra alone time with the Lord. I studied for a writing project without interruption and made progress on a book idea that I could not have made if it were not for the focused time. I never felt guilty or like I was behind on ministry responsibilities for 10 weeks. I refocused on my identity as a child of God rather than as a pastor. This was possible because my church gave me a sabbatical, and it is not only possible as a small-town pastor, but beneficial.

How It Helped
I want to first convince you that especially if you have been at a church for seven years or more, a sabbatical will be good for you and your church. Then we will look at some “nuts and bolts” of how to plan a sabbatical that will be a time of intentional rest, refreshment, and reset for you and your family, as well as your church.

Improved Health

At the start of sabbatical our family had the opportunity to go to Florida due to the kindness of our church family and of a couple in our church who owns a home in Florida. It was there that I began to realize how badly I had needed the sabbatical but also that I needed to change patterns when I returned. Multiple times in the first two weeks, when we were getting ready to go do something fun I began to have symptoms of severe anxiety. This went away with rest, showing me how tired I was. I did my best the entire sabbatical to get a full night’s sleep and at the end of the 10 weeks I had a noticeable difference in even having conversations with people—being more alert and able to focus more on them.

I also began to run again, something I used to enjoy and had not regularly done in over a decade. Post-sabbatical, I feel stronger and more efficient at work due to these health changes. While I’m still struggling to manage my schedule and get enough sleep, I now know what it feels like to be healthier. I’m working towards that and I’m still making time to run. What could God do for your physical and emotional health during a sabbatical?

Reset in Ministry & In My Personal Walk With God

I had a church member tell me just the other day that since sabbatical, there has been something different—in a good way—about me as a pastor. What we think we put our finger on is that in just over two months of being away from our church and ministry responsibilities, I was able to dig deeper into my identity as a child of God rather than first as a pastor. This has given me confidence as a leader, an area that I needed to grow in. I feel more freedom to lead because my roots are deeper in caring more about what God thinks about me and my leadership than what others may think.

Most years I attend other churches on Sundays during vacation two or three times. Visiting other churches Sunday after Sunday was deeply refreshing to me. I took sermon notes every time simply for my own soul’s growth, not for my next sermon or teaching opportunity. I also wrote down a few take-aways from every church we visited so that I could bring back helpful ideas to incorporate into our own church. After sabbatical I heard from many church members that one of the best things for them was to realize that even though they missed me and my family, that they could still be the church without me. If a sabbatical helps your church to focus on the fact that you are not Jesus, your sabbatical could be just as spiritually important for them as it is for you.

Family Relationship Investment

An entire article could be written on what this special time did for the relationships between my wife and me, and our kids. The three main sabbatical goals we had expressed to the church from the beginning were relationships, rest, and writing. Relationships were the most important. As you know, ministry has a way of stretching us and ministry in a small town often requires wearing more hats. We went into sabbatical with gratitude, realizing that our son leaves our home in four short years and trying to be intentional about time with him. By God’s grace, my wife and I planned for some time away and also as a couple at home both while the kids were at camp and with trusted friends for a few days so that we could focus on our marriage. Time with your family is never wasted time. It is good to work hard in ministry and with excellence for God’s glory (1 Corinthians 10:31), but it is also good to rest and play together (Genesis 2:1-3). When was the last time you had weeks where you hardly spoke about church and ministry other than in prayer? For us it had been way too long, and sabbatical gave us the space to do that. It was also good for our church to know that we were intentionally focusing on our marriage and parenting.

Writing or Study Project

Many pastors plan time for a writing or study project during sabbatical. I found this to be special time that made a genuine difference in my book idea. I made progress that was the fruit of having consecutive days to concentrate and see how concepts and Scriptures tie together. My only caution would be to plan this time in carefully, and no more than a week per month off. You and your wife know your situation better than anyone else, but I had a pastor friend who recommended two weeks of writing time during my two months off and I wish I had listened to him rather than planning for three. The important thing is to plan for a project that is life-giving and not an assignment you have to turn into your church when you return. They will be excited to know what you’re working on during this time, but set expectations so that they realize it is time for God to feed your soul whether that is through reading, writing, or a combination.

How We Planned It

Discussion with leadership

In my situation, the church had offered a sabbatical after five years but the timing (2020) was not right. So I discussed it with them and we agreed that 10 weeks was about the right amount of time given that I took a sabbatical after seven years and given the church’s schedule, staffing, and ability to bring in other speakers. We discussed logistics and problem-solved beginning about 18 months out and found this gave us enough time to plan well.

Communication With Congregation

Another elder, rather than me, communicated with the congregation about the sabbatical a little over one year out. We found that having another leader be the point person for the sabbatical gave him the chance to explain why a sabbatical was needed for me and how it would work, while also giving the congregation an opportunity to share excitement as well as concerns that could be addressed. I did help in the communication by writing a PDF that explained what the focus of our sabbatical would be and what our current plan was for the church, but he e-mailed it out for me so that I could still communicate with the congregation about sabbatical but with his help and support in discussing it with the congregation.

Intentional Budgeting and Church Life Planning

Part of those discussions first with leadership and then with the congregation included intentional budgeting. We budgeted to bring in enough pulpit supply that we could have half sermons from our own staff (if you don’t have another pastor on staff, elders and other leaders could preach as their gifts and desire allow even if it’s only a couple of times), and half sermons from pastor friends and ministry leaders. We planned to give the special speakers a gas/food stipend and to put them in a local Inn, in addition to an honorarium, so that we could bring speakers from further away who could still be rested and ready to serve our congregation well. We also planned the sabbatical during a time that many regular church ministries were already taking a pause for the summer.

Intentional Planning With Your Wife

If you are married, the most important one to plan sabbatical with is your wife. Listen to her. Hear her heart and value her thoughts and desires as you plan. Talk through every aspect of it, even well before sabbatical discussions with leadership. Talk and pray about what your goals and needs are, and how you can intentionally plan for maximum good effect on your marriage and your kids. We found our plans changing over time because I was turned down for a sabbatical grant but then on their own initiative and without our knowledge our church took an offering so we could do things we could not have done otherwise with my pastor salary. It was fun and marriage-building to dream and pray together about what God could do in our lives during the sabbatical. Because of this planning, it was even a joy to work on house projects together that had been left on the back burner too long due to our normal ministry schedule. 

Enjoy!

I once heard a pastor encouraging younger pastors to plan in regular sabbatical times even if they are only every seven years or so. He explained that after several sabbaticals at his current church and long ministry there, somebody said to him, “It must be nice.” He knows that he works hard, and that he is fulfilling the ministry God has for him, and that a sabbatical is good for him, his family, and his church. So with some of that confidence in God that can come with sabbatical time, he simply smiled and replied to his church member, “It is nice.” Fellow small-town pastor, if you are overdue for a sabbatical, I hope that you will be saying the same thing soon.

Blog at WordPress.com.